I can't believe today has come and gone. I feel like this day has been in the back (middle?) of my mind since Madi was born. I remember saying I didn't want her to start school because there is so much involved - early mornings of actually having to get dressed, lunches to pack, homework, and early bedtimes. But as I saw her grow and challenge herself in kindergarten, I started getting excited for 1st grade. I have never been one of those sappy moms when it comes to a kid growing up. To me, and I don't mean this offensively - we all have our own opinions/mindsets, it is a happy time when a kid turns a year older or goes to the next grade in school. This is something I'm getting to experience alongside my daughter so it is definitely exciting but shockingly, it was nerve-wracking, as well. I REALLY didn't anticipate being so anxious about her first day of "real" school. Last night I was so on edge about it. I was asking Paul if he thought I'd packed enough in her lunch box and asking him if I thought she would be okay after I dropped her off. I double and triple checked two alarm clocks. I prayed that she would wake up on her own this morning. (I really did. She's SO much more pleasant when she wakes up on her own versus when I have to nudge her awake.) I made sure her name was written on everything in her book bag. I made her an adorable binder cover. (She made me take it out when she saw it this morning.)
Well, all that anxiety and all those nerves were just silly. In the words of Madi: "Shouldn't I be the one all stressed out? I'm the one going to school!" Yes, she is right.
Were there zero hiccups this morning? Did I breeze through the first day of school routine without a hitch? No, of course not because life isn't perfect. Did we both make it without a huge disaster? Yes, absolutely. We got to school right before the tardy bell (had some shoe issues...) and I even managed to get a smile.
Turns out - she loved first grade. LOVED it. She couldn't stop telling me things. She wanted to keep her cool...that's just how Madi is. But she kept calling me into the room she was in and telling me more things about her day. "Ms. B is 22. And her favorite food is mac & cheese!" "We had 11 minutes to eat lunch. ELEVEN." and "I saw Courtney!" and "Carmen and I were SO close to getting the Hershey kisses." Also, "Math was soooo easy."
These are the moments that make me smile. And the moments that help me remember what God promises - that we don't need to worry or be anxious. It is a wasted emotion.
I'm so happy I was given this lesson in this way -- my girl is happy and that makes me happy.